Avoiding Disappointments

Have you seen my title? Funny, isn't it? For the most difficult thing to avoid in this world is DISAPPOINTMENT.  The more we tried to "expect the worst" and "hope for the best" (cliche, cliche and more cliche!) almost always the other way happens. You wake up in the morning exerting your effort to be your BEST self.  However, your worst keep peeking off your sleeves. Uncontainable! Then there will be a lot of quotes to change your mind set.  So easy to to be positive when you're at it but snaps back into reality once "inspirational" quotes left your sight.

Whoever says we are required to be nice and understanding all the time? Proper decorum does?  But what the hell is decorum? My definition - masked term for hypocrisy.  Arrgggh! Here goes my mind again. I keep on jumping from one thought to another? Why? Because I'm disappointed.  With what? With people who do not want to learn.  With people whom you silently wish could read between the lines but COULDN'T!  Then, to avoid more delusional "POSITIVE" thoughts, you just ignore the fact that they really ARE NOT INTERESTED. I know this could be incoherent or worst, NONSENSE.  But I'll blow off my steam anyway.  Before I'll blow someone else head. 

 

MORAL OF THE STORY...it's okay to be negative sometimes to be able to see the light.  Positive mindset can somehow lead to major disappointment because you're painting your own reality. Might as well EXPECT THE WORST... and nothing else. 

Facebook Hibernate Mode

July 1, 2012 - I decided to hibernate from Facebook. I have been wanting to do this months prior to my actual hibernation.  For the longest time, I couldn't, and I hate myself for it.  
Then something monumental happened on the 1st day of June which compelled me to look for a sacrifice to swap for an advocacy.  Top of mind was Facebook.  Don't get me wrong, I didn't say I QUIT. I said, I am hibernating.  As a 33-year old woman, I always try to do things for the right reasons (as much as I could). When I do, I experience great  struggles and hibernating from Facebook is not at all different.  Let me share the reasons why I did.

1. It's such a "time-waster". I realized that I am wasting a lot of my precious time just browsing through all the things that are written on my home page.  I even caught myself just scrolling up and down looking at the same posts. UNLIKE! (Hey! I could  have cleaned the bathroom during those precious moments instead. It will surely relieve me of my stress more than seeing not so productive posts)  

2. It's addictive.  I hate it when I feel that I am being drawn to something more than I should. I felt that I am not being fair to myself when there are a lot of productive things that I could have done.  I should have used those times to write, read or research on things that would be helpful to my growth. It's like a compulsion.  "Once you pop you just can't stop!". Every waking hours of my laptop is synonymous to FB. UNLIKE! So I guess it's time to PAUSE and reflect. (Boo! What ever happens to self-discipline)

3. It's anti-social.  In the past, I tried humoring myself that it's my way of being connected to my friends wherever they are. But I got lots of friends listed there that are more interested posting about silly stuff, playing apps/games or simply posting updates that are most of the time RANTING & RAVING. Only few, and I mean ONLY FEW are really concern about how you are or "what's up" with you. Only few would even say "hi" when you bump into their names in the CHAT area.   Funniest thing is a lot of people will add you and not even know what happens to you afterwhich. I just felt that the number of friends make them feel good somehow. Don't forget those who UNFRIEND you in a click of a mouse. UNLIKE! (Hahaha! Let me think, maybe I was the anti-social not FB. To each his own)

4. Missing out on WEB Logging (BLOG). UNLIKE! Imagine, I have not visited Facebook for  half a month only and I got a lot of things going for me on the web. I've been wanting to do this way back in 2010. So I activated my  Blogger account and developed 2 blogs, Mind Burst and Mom of Seraphim . I am now a member of Bloggers  and Mom Bloggers Club as well. 
     Prior to hibernation, I have been enjoying Pinterest and became a "happy Pinner"   already. To top it all, Google+ is pretty fabulous. (Come on! You could have done that while FBing! Excuses! Excuses!)

5. Explore life other than Facebook. Most often than not I peeked into my FB a lot more than necessary. Now, I connect more with my "real friends" in a more personal manner - SMS, Mobile Calls, Email invites and bonding over coffee. LIKE! (I am even prouder of myself that I hibernated from FB.)

     As I have said, I am on hibernation mode ONLY.   FB has been helpful to me. It is actually a tool that could be very effective if utilized well. Before I went into hibernation, I've started utilizing it more as a business tool. I've created 2 business pages, GoodHope Enterprise and i-MAJ.MarketingServices.  I merchandise products, promote events, invite friends and link those FB business pages to my personal page.
     
     I will go back.  Maybe after a month. This time for the right reasons.  I will discipline myself to use FB as a tool - to connect, communicate and be empowered.  Facebook is there to be used to our advantage.  Let us not be slaves to FB.  (I'm convincing myself in a small voice. Hahaha!)

     When I am ready, I will go back to FB on a different light. When I do I will tell FB that...IT'S NOT YOU FB...IT'S ME!  :)

Midnight Exploration

I am learning the ropes.  Doing it one "baby step" at a time. I know I need to do this.  I have been asked a lot of times.  I keep on ignoring "the call".  Now I am in a situation that I have no choice but to take a leap of faith and never look back. At the hindsight, it seems easy. But at the forefront, it's like going to a nursery school and learning the alphabet.  On top of that, I don't have the luxury to do this in the morning because I have to wear different hats, i.e., Mom, Wife, Consultant, Entrepreneur, etc.

There are so many things going on my mind in the morning that could have been a great blog material but will slowly vanish come evening.  But I don't mind.  In the first place, God brought me in blogsphere because I am called for a mission and part of that mission is to explore and learn. By doing so, I am stumbling upon a lot of topics, snippets and possibilities.  I'll just let it flow and lead me where I should be.  It has been like this anyways for almost 34 years.  I should say it is in a way...mystical and divine. 

Although this exploration has it's setback as well. I am always on the lookout waiting for clues and cues".  There are always lots of surprises.  So if you are not in for one, this is such a tough act to follow.

Photo downloaded from  http://s636.photobucket.com/profile/badguitar1/index 

But it excites me all the more to know that there are a lot of things coming up.  My life has been one big exploration from the start.  A path that is not new to me.  I have mixed emotions at times but I try to face everything head on. I didn't say nothing scares me. To be honest, I have a lot of apprehensions. But I am always willing to try, willing to learn and willing to surpass God's surprises with flying colors.  I know there are so much more before I truly learn the ropes. But in time I will...

Murphy's Law - Surge of Anger

I am no hypocrite. I will not say things that I don't really mean or do things that I don't want to do. Today was never an exception. Given that I woke up with raised voices of my mother, my bro and his ex-wife arguing about their kids, visitation rights, etc.  Thanks to my Seraphim, planting sweet and sloppy kisses on our lips making us feel that nothing is wrong.  Inside our room was oblivion but outside was a totally different story.

First time I went down to ensure breakfast is set, I was still okay. The second time I went down, this time with my boy, made my brow raised.  After seeing my nanny carrying the youngest son of my bro, the irked feeling returned instantaneously. I asked her to put the child down and handed my son over. The child's presence was connected to the earlier raised voices.

Excerpt: Ex-wife asked bro if she could borrow the kids, bro doesn't want saying the situation is getting more chaotic, ex-wife insisted, my parents were upset even saying that if she likes to borrow get them for good instead and so on.  When their youngest son arrived, ex-wife left and my father brought the child to her endorsing all the clothes.  Mother (ex-wife) doesn't want.  So to cut the story short, kids were borrowed for a day only.

Climax came later in the afternoon when the "ex-wife" sent back her kids like someone would to pets/puppies. They were "delivered" in our porch, not minding the "after rain" and "still drizzling" condition. That blew the situation out of proportion... Why would you treat kids like that? My heart was so upset. Our house was not a halfway house but they are treating it as such.  Ex-wife never even bothered to call to confirm if the kids will be fetched.  They were just...delivered. The raised voice became mine. Increasing in volume as the hour progressed. So my bro was upset as well. Went straight to the house where ex-wife was staying, gave him a piece of his mind with probably not so "mellowed" delivery.  Eldest bro's wife called him up.  Eldest bro called me up saying that his wife was irked because she felt that her parents were offended due to my bro's behavior towards his ex-wife in their (sis-in-law's parents) turf. It was tangled already. I asked my bro's ex-wife to come over and settle this once and for all. 

What started with irked ended as anger as I saw how the ex-wife reacted invalidating the story of my eldest bro. Eldest bro came and also he was mad and his tone was high because he knew that his wife was upset.  

It became messy and ugly :( I hate how it ends with the surge of anger that I felt.  The outburst that I had 

and the bad feeling that's still with me due to this. This is truly a Murphy's Law for me. I never liked it but it happened. I guess some things are bound to realize on its own. But really, these are the emotions that I rather have not. Flush it out and let it go...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murphy's_law